There are many obviously obvious methods by which to save water, and I’m sure the boring people have already laid those out. If I have just one talent, it is the ability to mine the utterly unobvious. I’m all about thinking outside the sandbox. Try these gems on for size, and don’t forget to thank me.
Public water fountains. You won’t die and you probably won’t even get sick much. Drink until you’re about to burst, then fill your sustainable, BPA-free, multi-liter goat’s bladder that you paid $130 for at Coach. If no one is looking you can maybe even wash your hair very quickly. No shampoo though, that’s kind of gross.
Make watermelons out of lemons. I always hear about the inconsiderate neighbor who overwaters and lets the excess run into your yard. I say plant a garden where it collects. Watermelon is 92 percent water, and it tastes much better than sour grapes! The hollowed-out rinds make for cool and refreshing headgear (patent pending).
Bathe your pet in the shower. I actually do this with my dog all the time. Other than a few shameful glances, he seems to be fine with it. If you try this with your cat, let me know how that works out.
Talk less. You lose water vapor with every word you speak; even more if you use a lot of “p” words or have a tendency to drool.
Fill your pockets with detergent (powdered is recommended) and swim in your clothes. Just not in my pool, thank you very much. I think they are OK with it at the waterpark, but check ahead of time.
Sweat collection parties: I’m still fleshing out the details on this one so stay tuned…